A recent spill on my bike has caused me to be a bit more reflective of my aging. I'll be 68 in a few weeks and, in September, E will turn 70. Neither of us feel we are old but our bodies daily remind us we are.
We have the usual aging signs: odd sleep, aches and pains and developing arthritis and forgetfulness. We have done what we can to take care of these while maintaining our quality of life. And we have a wonderful life we want to maintain. E has an appointment with a back specialist and has a follow up with his heart doctor in an effort to improve his mobility which has decreased significantly this past year.
Until this spill, for me, aging has been more superficial. I look down at my hands and wonder what old lady switched hers with mine. Age spots appear and grow, it takes me longer to cover the ones on my face and my hair...more wire and dry no matter what I use on it.
This spill has left me with a knee that is black and blue and missing a sizable amount of skin, a sprained or jammed finger and a palm also missing some skin and an aching shoulder. But, most of all, the spill was a wake up call about my mortality. We go through life thinking not me, I'm fine and I'll be able to walk, bike, run, etc. forever. Many seniors do and, once I heal, I'll start my morning walks again. I need to think about my bike, which I love. Perhaps it is time to trade it for a 3 wheeler, not necessarily a trike and perhaps I am overreacting and perhaps not.
I don't feel my age, not inside and not in the way I perceive myself. But, it does take me longer to recover from colds, injuries such as the ones from my spill, and longer to get myself in gear. I've given in to the afternoon Nana naps which I fought for eons. I can't keep up with the Grands the way I did even a year or so ago.
I believe a reality check is a good thing. I was riding my bike fast trying to get my speed up for short periods of time and BOOM! I hit a hose across a sidewalk the wrong way...bike went one way leaving me skidding across the sidewalk and into the wet grass the other way. I think my dignity was hurt more than my body parts...lol.
With all the cancer in my family, I have tried (sometimes not succeeding) to live each day fully and full steam ahead. Perhaps I can still do that but a slightly less 'damn the torpedoes' approach.
Off to (figuratively) lick my wounds, apply more antiseptic and ice and take it easy for a couple of days.
My new favorite song: When I Grow Up I Want to be an Old Lady...'cause I am!